I know it's been a while, and it is due in part to the fact that I am a fickle friend. To real people and to this internet blog. I always say I'll call; that I'll set up a date and then oops! Six weeks later, and I'm still nowhere closer to winning that friend of the year award. So first off, to all of you that I've neglected these last few months, know that it isn't personal. I'm trying to find balance in my life among financial struggles, trying to survive and falling in love.
AAAnd while we're on the topic, let's get something straight. Some people would say it's not wise to discuss one's personal life on a supposed work-centric forum. And if I were Katy Perry, I might agree with them. But, at least for now, I'm NOT her, and there are certainly no paparazzi banging on my door for the latest scandal involving me and my lovah. Plus, for me, my music life and my personal life have always been very much intertwined, so I may as well speak on the both of them.
Without going into too much detail, my boyfriend is wonderful and I am very much enjoying spending time with him and getting to know all the little things that make him who he is. I give credit to him, partially, for getting me out of my writing slump and helping me to see that there are certainly many things to live for. I had a period of bleak uncertainty after my father passed when I questioned everything and everyone and my writing was going nowhere. Being with my boyfriend offered me a new outlook on life and happiness. Also, getting back into the gym, meeting new people at work and learning to find the positive in each negative experience has helped goad me back into happy territory. I think since I've moved to LA I've learned a lot more about myself too, and I'm learning to be a grown-up. I certainly won't win an adult-of-the-year trophy either, but I'm getting there. It's all a learning process, which leads me to...
My new song. It's about my boyfriend, a major duh! if you couldn't figure THAT one out. So far, I'm getting great feedback. (Leave some of your own! It's called "...With You" and it's on my youtube channel). This song has been in the works for about a month, usually a bit longer than it takes me to get a song that I like where I want it to be. As an artist, it can be hard figuring out whether something you've created sounds good or great, and whether it will have appeal to anyone besides you. Sometimes you feel you can't quite find the right words, or capture the right emotions (or sometimes it takes six songs to get down everything you feel). Putting your creations out there is one of the most terrifying feelings in the world, REGARDLESS of whether you're Katy Perry and everyone knows who you are and is waiting for you to fail. Getting great positive feedback on this newest creation has lifted my confidence and enabled me to fear getting back out on the scene a lot less. I'm starting to plan writing sessions into my days, and I'm trying some different approaches. Whatever way it comes out, my followers and fans can always expect consistency from me: I tell it like it is. I don't smooth over the rough, and I don't dampen the joy at all.
So to anybody paying attention, watch out. Big things are coming for me, little by little, just you wait. Let's all try and find the happiness in each day and put it forward into the world.
Love you all!