Friday, October 26, 2012


      Okay, LA people. What the heck is up with none of y'all being able to drive? Like, SERIOUSLY!

     On Wednesday, I was out running some errands around town and LITERALLY every boneheaded driving move that can be made WAS MADE BY THE DRIVERS AROUND ME! It's like, come on people, I understand that sometimes you make a mistake or you have poor judgment. But this was INSANITY. I literally was yelling at them in my car. Like...

-Homegirl is supposed to stop at her stop sign. I'm there first. She goes basically right through it, so good thing I'm a defensive driver.

-Dude finds a parking spot, but instead of slowing down and using his turn signal he just stops and then just starts turning into the spot. But, like let me in on this secret. What do LA people have against turn signals? What did a turn signal ever do to you?

-Man in a very large truck (most likely with a very small penis) is on my ass at every stop sign. Like, is it necessary for you to make me feel guilty about making more of a complete stop than most other people do? I'm not gonna sit there for 5 minutes, but let me at least show the stop sign some respect and slow down for it.

-Some idiot in a teeny tiny car is driving so fast, that when I make a right turn into his lane, he decides he can't wait two seconds for me to speed up and then weaves in and out of both lanes until he gets to the lights- which, may I add, I'm right behind him for all them.

-Amigo on the freeway decides he is going to change lanes a bit after I do, but he isn't paying attention and almost side-swipes me. No WONDER the freeways here freak me out! Blind spots and 5 lanes and people not paying attention!! I used my turn signal, you dumbass!

     At any moment in time, if you listened to a recording of me in the car by myself, I'd either be harmonizing along to the radio or calling some lady a dumb bitch for doing something stupid. I'll usually be like, "Oh, okay, honey, well if you don't want to stop, then you should just go right ahead then. Please." Oh and one more thing. Pedestrians? I don't care if you are homeless, 100 years old, on a bike, or walking in stilettos but GET THE EFF OUT OF THE ROAD IF YOU DON'T SEE THE LITTLE WHITE PERSON. Why you gotta make me miss my ENTIRE green light because you walk really slow and decided you'd just make a go for it whenever your little heart desired. Guess what? You got a little brain too. And it's not working for me. I'll give you the right of way most times. But I expect a little courtesy and respect too. You watch out for me, I'll watch out for you.

 I'm sorry, but this all just had to come out. I can't handle all the crazy sometimes! Especially with the crazy I deal with at my job! I'm in the market for a second job...I'm on the lookout for something like an administrative assistant position at a music company. Because I can't have the restaurant be my only source of income anymore...I'm not making as much money and I just can't remain the friendly, nice, caring person I know I am when these hoes are bringing me down on a constant basis.


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